It will be like counting sheep, but instead of falling asleep, I'll fall into a blissful state of not giving any damns whatsoever.
It's been two days and I'm up to 187.
A good many of these were people I encountered in traffic while I was maneuvering my vehicle.
Another many of these were customer service professionals.
A few were people who looked me in the eye at the grocery store. They didn't smile and I felt mildly threatened.
One of them is the guy who thought I was trying to race him at a red light and took off like a bat out of hell when it turned green. I was trying to get the static off the radio station, fool. I'm back here driving like a normal person but you can turn around, come find me, and kiss my ass.
A few of them have been on television and will more than likely have to take a plane to come kiss my ass. That would be so thrilling! To have someone travel to come kiss my ass. Imagine. A destination ass.
I lost count a few times, but on those instances I just started over at 150 instead of zero because I figure there's probably a ton of people that have crossed me and I didn't know it, or will think about crossing me but not get the opportunity to carry it out, and I want to count those people. I want to make sure I don't leave anyone out because I am all about fairness.
I'm going to need more ass space but don't worry, I'm working on it.
I'm finding that simply counting the person-who-can-kiss-my-ass instead of taking up valuable time and mental energy plotting their doom has really calmed me down and freed up a lot of time that I can use to get other stuff done.
Besides, when a cashier says, a little too harshly, that she can't take your coupon and you say "172," it really throws her off, which is fun to watch.