Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Mood Waves

So yesterday was a depressed day, again, full on with Random Weeping. I had a double yesterday, which means I had two shifts; I was there for lunch then back again for dinner.

I arrived for my first shift only to find the front doors locked. Instead of going around to the back or even the side where I could surely go in, I went and sat on a bench in the cold and cried.

Returning for my dinner shift, I went to a long back room used for large parties and cried. That was a real weeping session.

The way I would have put it, if anyone had asked, was that it felt like God had gone behind a cloud.

And there were just suckish events yesterday which spurred me on in the direction of general life loathing, such as standing up and banging my head. Little things like that which you tally up when you're depressed.

Then today I popped up quite normal. Today has been just fine and I'm sure the new manager who inquired as to my state of mind yesterday might be a little confused as he continues to acclimate to his new staff, which includes me.

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